The Leader As Coach understands the following distinction: 

discern vs. judge

To discern means to observe information and then draw conclusions based on that information.  Discern is when we are able to pick up every aspect of what is occurring or what we observe without having to judge the person as in compare, diminish, make wrong or feel better than.

A team leader discerns better when

• his needs are met
• he doesn't get his energy from the other person (team member, client, etc.)
• he doesn't feel pressure to perform
• he is independent

People judge because they're threatened in some way or reminded of a piece of themselves that is yet to be reconciled.  Compassion is also important because it keeps the observation on the discernment side vs. the judgmental side.

NOTE:  One can discern without judging and still have a strong opinion and/or label or peg the person.

Discernment can be an active process vs. just a passive one.  It's the Leader As Coach's job to peg, or discern, who their client (direct report, coworker, team member, etc.) is, where they're at, what's in the way, and what's really going on.  The Leader As Coach who thinks less of a team member, diminishes them or stops standing up or behind them (as in putting them in a small box) is judging, not discerning.

In the video clip below, which do you see happening?  Discerning or judging?

Clients (teams) who come to work with a teamwork coach generally have a vested interest in keeping things the same or in creating a new version of all their past problems.

Instead, we want the team to permanently and fully resolve what it is they're attempting to work on rather than continually growing in circles. 

The teamwork coach seeks to give them a path and have them finish what it is they think would take them a long time to work on. 

The team should work with a teamwork coach to finish things quickly (to resolve them) rather than to stretch out the process.

Some teams are unwilling to resolve issues.  They instead choose to work on them, and work on them some more, and then work on them some more, and... (you get the idea). 

What is the difference between a consultant who works with teams and a teamwork coach?

Consultants are linear.  They deal with information and step-by-step approaches to solving problems or creating opportunities. 

A teamwork coach does that and adds one more element, and that third-dimensional element is this: the teamwork coach develops the individual players on a personal level. 

A computer analogy: 

• The team consultant arrives with a new piece of software to install.
• The teamwork coach installs a new processor and upgrades the operating system so the computer runs faster and with greater efficiency. 

The teamwork coach understands that winning is not just about what the team members do or what they want.  A teamwork coach helps develop who the person is - - their values, standards, boundaries, legacy, etc.

Because the teamwork coach helps the players in a three dimensional way, the results achieved are often remarkable when compared to the linear approach of the team consultant.

In your role as team leader, do you act as a champion for your team members or are you a cheerleader?

When you champion someone, you champion the person regardless of the results. 

You cheerlead to praise results or in order to get results.  Cheerleading is a form of seduction.

As a teacher of team skills (or leader of a team), which do you find yourself doing more often, assisting the team or helping the team?  There is a very important distinction between the two.

To help someone means to step in, as in an auto accident.  When you see someone on the pavement, you're going to go in and help that person, you're going to touch them, you're going to turn them over, you're going to direct traffic, and so on.

Usually you help someone after they're already in trouble. 

To assist someone (individual or team) means to guide them but not step over the line and help them out of the predicament.  They have to be awake and alive enough to request assisstance rather than needing you to jump in and save the day.

As a teamwork coach, you should be spending 98% of your time assisting the team (or individual team members) when they're well and they're able to ask for help, and 2% of your time stepping in when they're over their heads, are having a really bad day or really need someone to step in and be their best friend for an hour or two. 

Sometimes we tend to help vs. assist because we wish someone had done this for us ehen we were stuck. 

But sometimes it's best for the person (or team) to not get "help" and instead hit bottom until things get so bad they bounce up and reach for assistance.

About Distinctions: 
The first of the two words or terms is generally the better, stronger, more useful one. Usually, nothing is "wrong" with the second word or term; it is simply weaker or less inclusive.  A teamwork coach will hear "where" the group is and/or what word of the two words the team (or a member of the team) is oriented around or coming from.  For example, many groups are still "stuck" in the power dynamic of life (force, dominance, victory, win/lose, etc.).  For a team to evolve, they would want to embrace and reorient around the notion of strength (resourcefulness, collaboration, win/win, development/success from within, etc.).  Even a single distinction can add tremendous value to a team and help them evolve.

© 1997 Copyright by Coach U.  All rights reserved.  Used with permission

A culture is a collection of historical beliefts, behaviors, attitudes, rituals or agreed upon social intercourses.

We are the product of our culture, historically.

As coaches of teams, however, we want our clients to be equally if not more influenced by their community which is more in the present and more influential and more empowering, often, than cultural norms and expectations.

If one is following cultural expectations, one is probably not relating fully with the present because they're being guided or dictated to by the past, and a community of people you love is a healthier form of influence than their culture.

About Distinctions: 
The first of the two words or terms is generally the better, stronger, more useful one.  Usually, nothing is "wrong" with the second word or term; it is simply weaker or less inclusive.  A coach will hear "where" the group is and/or what word of the two words the team (or a member of the team) is oriented around or coming from.  For example, many groups are still "stuck" in the power dynamic of life (force, dominance, victory, win/lose, etc.).  For a team to evolve, they would want to embrace and reorient around the notion of strength (resourcefulness, collaboration, win/win, development/success from within, etc.).  Even a single distinction can add tremendous value to a team and help them evolve.

© 1997 Copyright by Coach U.  All rights reserved.  Used with permission